Anger

To those who know me, you most likely know that I consider myself slow to anger, I try to let things slide, or at least thats what I've been doing in the past. Here recently though, I find myself getting so angry at this one person in my class. It's like every chance he gets, he will cut me down, or otherwise belittle me. Its so aggravating!

Anyways, I've been under much stress lately, with exams, and failing some tests and stuff. Its all a ton of junk. Ugh, I'm so stressing. But God is good, and I know that he will not give us anything that we cannot handle. This isn't one of those spiritual revelation blogs, however, I just needed to get some stress out of my head before I burst asunder(I like that word).

I don't have good study habits at all. That fool rubs it in my face, made everything worse, inside I had that burning human desire to hit him in the face, how unchristian, I had to walk away to cool off and talk to God. I can't do this on my own, my human nature is a terrible vermin, yet God, even through this still loves me.

I keep on thinking that FTC would be much more enjoyable without this guy around because really, he is the one who causes me much pain and Misery. And take a look at it, I'm always getting stuck with him, I'm his roommate, He's into the same field of interest as me, so we get stuck together by our teachers at every possible opportunity. His very personality is somewhat repulsive to my instinct, what's worse is that he thinks he is doing me a favor sometimes by what he does.

Maybe I'm just foolish for thinking all of this, but I too am only human, and I do give into human desires, for the only thing that can keep me away from my flesh(human nature) is Christ Jesus, and/or the super amazing counselor that he had sent, the Divine Holy Spirit of God! Anyways, I feel sort of disconnected from that today, and I don't have the opportunity to pray at the current moment, but, I guess studying, which is what I'm about to do, is somewhat an equivalent, because I am studying His Word.

My heart burns for vengeance but it is not mine to take, everything I have an own is Gods, I have given my life to him, and I don't want to do anything apart from His will, for He knows what is best for us.

So God, take my anger, and do whatever you please with it. Take it away from me, I give it to you, for your word says "Cast your cares upon him, for he cares for you" You willingly take our burdens. You are so amazing God. I just don't even want this anger in my heart anymore, because it is not of you. Heal me and break me, for I am your servant, and I have fully given my life to you. It is my pleasure to serve you. Thank you Jesus for all of the wonderful things you have done in my life. Amen.