Yeah, so anyways, I was sitting here looking around and indulging myself in My favorite anime series, and I just felt so empty and called by the lord. I feel empty alot of times, and I know it is the devils job to keep me from him. Anyways, I prayed, for the first time in a long time, and for less than I should. I feel more full, but I still cant help from indulging myself in other things. It's like I'm always cutting the lords time short. It's like he's not my first priority. But let me tell you, it's so hard making God first. He always expects so much out of me, and I feel that I'm just not up to the challenge.
I have to get out and go preach to the school, and half the time I dont even have my own salvation figured out yet. Its all just so hard. I want the truth and nothing but the truth, and a long time ago I made a committment to follow that. So I'm going to leave right now to do just that. Fifteen Minutes with God, that has got to be the least I can do, and the best I can afford. I just wish there were an easier way to have that so awesome fulfillment.
This must be ten times easier for Shye than it is for me. Sometimes it seems that has no problems in life, she can get by with anything and get away with everything. I'll bet it wasn't even hard for her to make the switch, and her daily challenges are so simple to her. What does she have that I dont? Is it a problem with my heart?
